'My buttered toast waits for nobody'
In this phenomenally popular Victorian novel, the calculating Mrs Catherick reveals in a letter the secret of her daughter's birth, and shows her inimitable way with words
From The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins
Have I satisfied your curiosity? I have taken pains enough to satisfy it at any rate. There is really nothing else I have to tell you about myself or my daughter. My worst responsibilities, so far as she was concerned, were all over when she was secured in the Asylum. I had a form of letter relating to the circumstances under which she was shut up, given me to write, in answer to one Miss Halcombe, who was curious in the matter, and who must have heard plenty of lies about me from a certain tongue well accustomed to the telling of the same. And I did what I could afterwards to trace my runaway daughter, and prevent her from doing mischief by making inquiries myself in the neighbourhood where she was falsely reported to have been seen. But these, and other trifles like them, are of little or no interest to you after what you have heard already.
So far, I have written in the friendliest possible spirit. But I cannot close this letter without adding a word here of serious remonstrance and reproof, addressed to yourself.
In the course of your personal interview with me, you audaciously referred to my late daughter's parentage on the father's side, as if that parentage was a matter of doubt. This was highly improper and very ungentlemanlike on your part! If we see each other again, remember, if you please, that I will allow no liberties to be taken with my reputation, and that the moral atmosphere of Welmingham (to use a favourite expression of my friend the rector's) must not be tainted by loose conversation of any kind. If you allow yourself to doubt that my husband was Anne's father, you personally insult me in the grossest manner. If you have felt, and if you still continue to feel, an unhallowed curiosity on this subject, I recommend you, in your own interests, to check it at once, and for ever. On this side of the grave, Mr. Hartright, whatever may happen on the other, that curiosity will never be gratified.
Perhaps, after what I have just said, you will see the necessity of writing me an apology. Do so, and I will willingly receive it. I will, afterwards, if your wishes point to a second interview with me, go a step farther, and receive you. My circumstances only enable me to invite you to tea—not that they are at all altered for the worse by what has happened. I have always lived, as I think I told you, well within my income, and I have saved enough, in the last twenty years, to make me quite comfortable for the rest of my life. It is not my intention to leave Welmingham. There are one or two little advantages which I have still to gain in the town. The clergyman bows to me—as you saw. He is married, and his wife is not quite so civil. I propose to join the Dorcas Society, and I mean to make the clergyman's wife bow to me next.
If you favour me with your company, pray understand that the conversation must be entirely on general subjects. Any attempted reference to this letter will be quite useless—I am determined not to acknowledge having written it. The evidence has been destroyed in the fire, I know, but I think it desirable to err on the side of caution, nevertheless.
On this account no names are mentioned here, nor is any signature attached to these lines: the handwriting is disguised throughout, and I mean to deliver the letter myself, under circumstances which will prevent all fear of its being traced to my house. You can have no possible cause to complain of these precautions, seeing that they do not affect the information I here communicate, in consideration of the special indulgence which you have deserved at my hands. My hour for tea is half-past five, and my buttered toast waits for nobody.
About the Author
Wilkie Collins (1824-89) was an English novelist and playwright best known for his significant contributions to the genre of detective fiction. Collins rose to literary stardom with The Woman in White (1859), considered one of the earliest and finest examples of the "sensation novel", a genre that reached its peak during the middle of the nineteenth century and achieved literary infamy in its unique blend of crime, suspense, and social deviance. A close friend and collaborator of Charles Dickens, Collins's innovative narrative techniques and intricate plots have left an enduring mark on the mystery and suspense genres.
What we love about this passage…
Driven by his penchant for the stage (Collins himself dramatized many of his novels, and penned several original dramas), Collins gave many of his characters a predisposition to the dramatic monologue. Even in The Woman in White, a novel made famous for its innovative blend of epistolary narration and paratextual fragments (a portion of the story is told by a tombstone, for instance), Collins brings characters to life not just through actions but through speech. We love the way Collins transforms Mrs. Catherick, a minor character, into a highly theatrical figure—entirely through her words.
The final line of this letter, for example, practically begs to be read aloud, don’t you think?
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Dr Robert Laurella is an expert in nineteenth-century literature, particularly the works of Wilkie Collins.
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